Doubting Thomas

#APG

Easter was last Sunday.  Resurrection day.   Jesus the Messiah rising from the dead.  A great day of celebration for all Christians.  It’s a time of year I really spend time meditating on the Easter account in scripture.  The meditations began several weeks ago as I prepared for the season of renewal.  I learn something new every time I study His death, resurrection and ascension.

Jesus showed Himself to the disciples in the room where they were hiding.  Thomas was not there.  When the disciples told Thomas they had seen the Lord, his response was what I think was a normal human response.  “Unless I see in His hands the imprint of the nails, and put my finger into the place of the nails, and put my hand into His side, I will not believe.”  John 20:25 The quote has given Thomas the nick name “doubting Thomas”.  Hey, at least Thomas had the nerve to verbalize his true feelings.  Tell it like it was.  Most people keep doubts about Jesus to themselves.

Eight days later, Jesus reappeared.  Jesus addressed Thomas quickly – “Reach here with your finger, and see My hands; and reach here your hand and put it into My side; and do not be unbelieving, but believing.”  John 20:27 Thomas quickly responded with “My Lord and my God!” John 20:28

First off, something I have overlooked, no one told Jesus what Thomas had said.  Yet, Jesus not only knew but addressed Thomas’ doubts exactly.  I forget a lot, Jesus knows.  Jesus knows my heart, my doubts, my fears, my thoughts, my actions and every word spoken.  I also forget He responds and addresses me directly.  I only have to listen, keep my eyes open, and realize He is my Lord and my God!  Jesus!

Secondly, I am a “doubting Thomas”.  During the last two years, I have doubted Jesus often.  Oh, I haven’t said it out loud to anyone, but in my thoughts and actions I have done so.  Without even realizing what I was doing.  Doubting Jesus can take care of situations which so trouble me.  Doubting Jesus’ reasons for Amanda dying so young.  Doubting life.

Trying to handle situations and people on my own is- doubting at its worst.  Doubting His power.  Doubting Jesus can take care of everything.

Thing is, once I realized my sin, asked Jesus to forgive me and turned it over to Him, things have felt so much better.  Now instead of looking at situations and people with a negative outlook, I feel more at peace.  Relationships are better.  Worry is gone.  See, it’s not my place to fix.  It’s not my place to restore.  It’s not my place to heal. It’s not my place to convict.  It is my place to love others, encourage others, teach others, be content in all situations, comfort others and most importantly, lead others to Jesus.  Jesus, all powerful, Jesus.  Jesus, the only reason and way I can handle this life.

Amanda died two years ago on April 11th.  I miss her every day and often wonder if there will ever be a day when I do not think about her and our family without her.  Listening to other mothers who have lost a child, I don’t think so.  I am thankful there are now more happy thoughts than sad.

#APG
Amanda, Her Dad and Her Big Brother – Easter

Jesus knows all.  Jesus is all powerful.  Jesus is my comforter.  Jesus is my friend.  Jesus is with me until the end of the age.  I must learn to trust more and not doubt. I must learn to follow and allow Him to lead. Doubting denies He is The LORD.

One of my favorite passages in the Bible is: Luke 24:5 – 8 “and as the women were terrified and bowed their faces to the ground, the men said to them, “Why do you seek the living One among the dead?  “He is not here, but He has risen. Remember how He spoke to you while He was still in Galilee, saying that the Son of Man must be delivered into the hands of sinful men, and be crucified, and the third day rise again.” And they remembered His words,”

I must remember His words.  I must remember I serve the living Son of God.  I must remember I am not alone.  We are not alone!

I pray these writings bring you some comfort.  I pray it will help you to live life.  To not give up and not give in.

To God be all Glory and Power now and forever!  Amen.

Love and Hugs to all of you.  Manda’s Mom #APG

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