What am I willing to do to live peaceably with all people? I have been thinking about it a lot lately. It seems to be hard to do these days. Live peaceably. Scripture tells us in Romans 12:18 “If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.” (ESV) All I can say as there seems to be turmoil surrounding me these last couple of years.
I do realize a lot of it is straight from Satan. Confusion and strained relationships and hurt and misunderstandings and uncertainty and stress and anxiety are not of God. I have been told people feel tension around me; not just around me but in the whole room. So, what am I to do? I really do not want others to feel uncomfortable. I want to have a peaceable relationships with all.
It’s why I have had difficulty writing these last few weeks. What do I say to keep the peace? What do I do to keep the peace? How do I make others feel at ease when I am around?
The answer to make some feel more comfortable is to just not be around them. Stay away. Simple enough. There are those I have no choice but to be around, unless I become a hermit. And then there are others I want to be around. They enhance my life greatly.
**I started writing this yesterday. Didn’t finish because I was having a hard day; simply had to go home and go to bed. Then, well to put it mildly, I lost it with a couple of people. Said things that I should have kept to myself. I was too emotional to be handling any situation but I continued on to the point of hurting them. Lost my self control which in turn hurt someone else. Not a way to live peaceable with people when it’s in my power to do so. I apologized but, we all know, words hurt. I know it very, very, very, well. I have to learn to give it to God – my emotions – part of being a Christian is living the fruits of the Spirit. Self-control and gentleness were lost to me last night. Sin. My sin. Galatians 5: 22 & 23 “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.”
The following passage is prior to the “Fruits of the Spirit” passage: “But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the desires of the flesh are against the Spirit, and the desires of the Spirit are against the flesh, for these are opposed to each other, to keep you from doing the things you want to do. But if you are led by the Spirit, you are not under the law. Now the works of the flesh are evident: sexual immorality, impurity, sensuality, idolatry, sorcery, enmity, strife, jealousy, fits of anger, rivalries, dissensions, divisions, envy, drunkenness, orgies, and things like these. I warn you, as I warned you before, that those who do such things will not inherit the kingdom of God.” Galatians 5: 16-21
I am thankful I can not lose my salvation. Jesus paid the price for my sin. My sins are forgiven. I am still a sinner. I sinned with a lack of self-control and gentleness last night. Being emotional is no excuse. I have asked the Lord to forgive me. I have asked them to forgive me. I am sure I will still pay the price for the sin. It will take a while for the relationships to heal. They may not ever be the same. It breaks my heart.
I have a big heart. I love people. I really do. I go in with my whole heart. It’s why I hurt so deeply. Especially, when I know I have hurt someone. Especially, when I love someone and they don’t love me back. Especially, when I love someone and feel abandoned or wronged. I have to pray for others more, especially when I feel hurt. I still love people with my whole heart but there are some I have to avoid. Bad company ruin good morals.
Amanda’s death does not give me a pass in the way to treat others. I am to treat them the way I would want them to treat me. I am to love them as I love myself. First and foremost I am to love God with my whole heart and live in the Spirit not the flesh. “And he answered, “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind, and your neighbor as yourself.” “ Luke 10:27 (ESV) Anger will never produce the righteousness of God.
Life is difficult. I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop. The next stone to be thrown. The next thing to happen that will hurt me to my very core.
It’s hard after losing a child to not allow emotions to control our lives. After all, we are emotional. Unless we run and try not to deal with it, we are going to be up and down. Emotions raging wide and wildly at times. No one, absolutely no one, can replace the child we have lost. But, we have to remember we are among the living. We have to treat them as we want to be treated regardless. We have to love them. We have to pray for them. We can choose to not be around those who cause us to stumble or fall – those who are hurting us. But, we still have to love them and pray extra for them. We have to try our hardest to live peaceably with all when it’s within our power to do so.
So, what am I willing to do to live peaceably with others? Live boldly for the Lord. Live in the Spirit not the flesh. Love others regardless. Pray for others, including those who hurt me. Guard my heart. Avoid certain people and situations. It’s all Scriptural. The Word is my guide – the light to my path. Yours too. We are not alone. Jesus, the same yesterday, today and forever loves us and cares for us.
Love and hugs to all of you
Manda’s Mom #APG
NOTE: Help and support is hard to find when you have a child die. I’ve always recommended your family physician first. I have a great relationship with my Doctor, he has helped me tremendously.
I have been doing some research and came across the following web sites that may be of some help. They have chapters which meet all over the United States. https://www.compassionatefriends.org and https://www.bereavedparentsusa.org
I hope these will be helpful to you. I am not endorsing the groups. I do not really know enough to do so but I thought with so many request, I should share the two major ones I found.